Airing out bad news again, it just seems to never end. It's said when it rains it pours, or bad things come in sets of three, or history repeats itself, all to very true!
My Grandmother passed Feb 3, 2013. I am having a hard time dealing some days, but when I'm able to see my Grandfather the sad memories fade for a little while.
March came and went and for the whole month I was recovering from having my 4 wisdom teeth removed and then a hematoma recovery. Overall the surgery process went well, def glad it's done and over with and will not have to experience that again (: But it took a whole month of antibiotics and dentist follow up appts to get back to my "normal" self.
Moving to April, the month started out refresed feeling, I was feeling better, I had a big day coming up with my childhood friend Hollys wedding approaching fast. So I was in high gear trying to get my Matron of Honor role finished and polished. My plans for celebration were haulted quickly, as I discovered Gio & I were expecting. Due to my pregnancy history, this was a very scary time. I was followed by my wonderful docs with ultrasounds and bloodwork to make sure this would be a viable pregnancy. That was the week of the wedding, I had been advised to take it easy, and of course no typical Brandi celebrating. Which was fine no biggie, my mind was off in another world trying to go through the "what if's". Eventually it was official that the pregnancy ended up in my tube and not going anywhere, Methotrexate injections were needed. I received my first one and was taken off of work for "bedrest" and until it was determined what would happen, the goal was to keep my tube, and keep me out of surgery. I was in the office everyother day for more bloodwork and ultrasounds, which after my first round of the injection, another round was needed as the pregnancy mass continued to grow, causing concern for a tube rupture and surgery. After another week went by of the same bloodwork and ultrasounds, and the med seem to be working, I was able to come back to work. Which was such a relief! One and a half days into working, and sever pain, another ultrasound was done and it was determined that the mass continued to grow, the injections did not work and my only choice now was surgery :( Surgery went well, as I have the best doctors :) but again I was off of work recovering. I finally got to return to work mid May.
Fast forward to the end of May, the day after Memorial Day, I found out that my dad's cancer had returned, but is now in his lungs, he will go through chemo. My parents are already struggling financially and emotionally and this new round of meds and doctor appts is going to make things much worse.
Last night Gio and I were talking, about how hopefully soon there will be a light at the end of the tunnel. How will the bad news end anytime soon, we all could use some good news and a long break from the bad, and how history def does repeat itself. In 2005 Gio's sister Tesah passed away, shortly after that his mom was diagnosed with cancer and after that I had surgery for a ruptured tube and no pregnancy. Here we are 6-7yrs later following an all to familiar pattern. My dad was diagnosed with cancer, my grandmother passed away due to complications of cancer, and I had lost another pregnancy and had surgery to remove my ruptured tube.
When will the sorrow, the heartache end? When will the Good Lord say enough, good times ahead? Will there ever be good times again? I don't know, but Gio, my family, and I have had our fair share, it has poured, out threesome has happened, and history is slamming it's ugly self right in our faces. Hopefully soon we'll see good times :)
Sunday, June 2, 2013
Sunday, February 10, 2013
Grandma, the Best Lady that ever lived.
One week ago today, my grandma passed away. And almost to the minute that i begin typing this did i get the call from my mom. She passed sometime between 4am (when aunt mary last saw her) and 6/6:30 when grandpa found her while he was getting ready for church. Sunday Feb 3, 2013 was the longest day i truly believe i've ever had.
The last time i saw grandma, was less than a month ago. That day she was in good spirits, alert, and had far more energy than she did that night before. It was the so nice to see her in such a way, as it had been a long time. Sadly, we said our final goodbyes and had our final hug and kiss. And I told her i would see her again in no time, and she said i know.
I will miss her so much, she was everything to me and my family. It's hard to believe she is gone, never her to give kisses, advice, support, or that loving familiar sound when coming in to give a welcome hug, "Ooo Brandi" big tight hug here! and there was always an i love you so much, followed instantly with do you need something to eat? lol.
When I arrived to your and grandpas house tuesday it's like the roles were changed. Grandpa was there and so excited to see me. I tried my best to stay strong for him, but i even heard his voice crack, broke my heart. He doesn't want to be without you, his bride, his princess. But he reassured me that you two had a long, loving relationship, and that he will see you again (:
Abbie, Allison, & I put together some of your pictures, what a beauty you were when young (: and grandpa so handsome, no wonder you two picked eachother!
You could just see how much you and grandpa really loved each other, you could see it the way you looked at him and the way he looked at you. a true love story! <3
Your viewing day was a long hard day, especially for grandpa. But i will never forget when he came into see you, he finally broke down, spoke with you, and gave you kisses. He is gonna miss you so so much, your all he talks about! :D So many people came out and the rosary was lovely as always. But it was a cold cold overcast day, which really didn't help matters.
Your funeral day was a gorgeous, bright, sunny day, and much warmer than the day prior, like you where right there! the service was beautiful, with lots of touching songs. On Eagles Wings (one of my personal favs) and How Great Thou Art.We were all reminded about Love:
The Native American Drum was present, which was so fitting and peaceful, but at the same time made everything so real. before that I felt I was living in a dream, I really did. It was so unreal I felt. I thought you and grandpa would live forever, I really did!!
It's hard to think that I will never see your human body anymore and it's even harder to think that grandpa is ready to see you again, so his time will be up soon also. We've never known life without either of you and i can't bare to think of it. But i do know one thing, that I want to see you again, I want to live a simple life like you and grandpa, and have a love with gio like you had with grandpa! :D
I will always LOVE you, I will work on being more like you and Grandpa, I will have a long loving marriage with Gio, as you did with Grandpa. And I ask that you continue to look over me!
You were the BEST Lady I've ever known! And I cherish every memory I have of you. . .I'll see you again before you know it Grandma!! And I can't wait for that familiar hug!!
The last time i saw grandma, was less than a month ago. That day she was in good spirits, alert, and had far more energy than she did that night before. It was the so nice to see her in such a way, as it had been a long time. Sadly, we said our final goodbyes and had our final hug and kiss. And I told her i would see her again in no time, and she said i know.
I will miss her so much, she was everything to me and my family. It's hard to believe she is gone, never her to give kisses, advice, support, or that loving familiar sound when coming in to give a welcome hug, "Ooo Brandi" big tight hug here! and there was always an i love you so much, followed instantly with do you need something to eat? lol.
When I arrived to your and grandpas house tuesday it's like the roles were changed. Grandpa was there and so excited to see me. I tried my best to stay strong for him, but i even heard his voice crack, broke my heart. He doesn't want to be without you, his bride, his princess. But he reassured me that you two had a long, loving relationship, and that he will see you again (:
Abbie, Allison, & I put together some of your pictures, what a beauty you were when young (: and grandpa so handsome, no wonder you two picked eachother!
You could just see how much you and grandpa really loved each other, you could see it the way you looked at him and the way he looked at you. a true love story! <3
Your viewing day was a long hard day, especially for grandpa. But i will never forget when he came into see you, he finally broke down, spoke with you, and gave you kisses. He is gonna miss you so so much, your all he talks about! :D So many people came out and the rosary was lovely as always. But it was a cold cold overcast day, which really didn't help matters.
Your funeral day was a gorgeous, bright, sunny day, and much warmer than the day prior, like you where right there! the service was beautiful, with lots of touching songs. On Eagles Wings (one of my personal favs) and How Great Thou Art.We were all reminded about Love:
Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, [love] is not pompous, it is not inflated,d
5it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury,e
6it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth.
7It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.f
8*
Love never fails. If there are prophecies, they will be brought to
nothing; if tongues, they will cease; if knowledge, it will be brought
to nothing.
9For we know partially and we prophesy partially,
10but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away.
11When I was a child, I
used to talk as a child, think as a child, reason as a child; when I
became a man, I put aside childish things.
12At present we see
indistinctly, as in a mirror, but then face to face. At present I know
partially; then I shall know fully, as I am fully known.g
13* So faith, hope, love remain, these three;h but the greatest of these is love. The Native American Drum was present, which was so fitting and peaceful, but at the same time made everything so real. before that I felt I was living in a dream, I really did. It was so unreal I felt. I thought you and grandpa would live forever, I really did!!
It's hard to think that I will never see your human body anymore and it's even harder to think that grandpa is ready to see you again, so his time will be up soon also. We've never known life without either of you and i can't bare to think of it. But i do know one thing, that I want to see you again, I want to live a simple life like you and grandpa, and have a love with gio like you had with grandpa! :D
I will always LOVE you, I will work on being more like you and Grandpa, I will have a long loving marriage with Gio, as you did with Grandpa. And I ask that you continue to look over me!
You were the BEST Lady I've ever known! And I cherish every memory I have of you. . .I'll see you again before you know it Grandma!! And I can't wait for that familiar hug!!
Catherine Mae Nagy
birth. 10/9/1928
deceased. 2/3/2013
age. 84
marriage. 5/20/1950
married for 62 yrs to Augustus Nagy.
6 children
13 grandchildren
13 great grandchildren
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
My World, Falling Apart
September 11, 2001 was a day I will never forget, where I was and what I was doing. I was junior in high school sitting in home economics class when the loud speaker came on overhead to inform myself and fellow classmates that our country was under attack! Our world has never been the same since. Every year thousands of people I didn't even know are honored, and will continue to be honored and remembered.
September 11, 2012 yet another day I will never forget what I was doing. . .that evening as I pulled into my driveway, my dad calls me. He had surgery that friday just before and I knew he had a follow up appt that day, but the news I ws about to hear was so overwhelming! I answered the phone to hear my dads voice. He said he went to the doctors appt and that his biopsy results were back which were positive for CANCER!!! MY DAD HAS CANCER!!! I didn't even know what to say, my heart hurt, my stomach and head were spinning! My dad kept his cool (like always) and didn't have many answers other than they were coming down here to see an oncologist.
After hanging up the phone, my frustration, anger, sadness, confusion, and heartache came through! My whole world felt like it was falling apart. My Dad, Mom, Sister & I went to IU Hospital yesterday for answers, we really didn't get any, but have moved forward in the direction to answers. We all spent the day at the hospital while my Dad underwent a CT scan to make sure this cancer doesn't or hasn't spread to his lungs and a MRI to make sure the surgery my Dad had had gotten all of the cancer cells from his body. We are now waiting on results which should come back by the end of the week. I pray every night that things will turn out positive and that myself and the rest of our family can "keep it together" for my Dad, he needs all the support we can give him! I LOVE YOU DAD!! And you'll pull through this, and we'll be right beside you all the way!!!
September 11, 2012 yet another day I will never forget what I was doing. . .that evening as I pulled into my driveway, my dad calls me. He had surgery that friday just before and I knew he had a follow up appt that day, but the news I ws about to hear was so overwhelming! I answered the phone to hear my dads voice. He said he went to the doctors appt and that his biopsy results were back which were positive for CANCER!!! MY DAD HAS CANCER!!! I didn't even know what to say, my heart hurt, my stomach and head were spinning! My dad kept his cool (like always) and didn't have many answers other than they were coming down here to see an oncologist.
After hanging up the phone, my frustration, anger, sadness, confusion, and heartache came through! My whole world felt like it was falling apart. My Dad, Mom, Sister & I went to IU Hospital yesterday for answers, we really didn't get any, but have moved forward in the direction to answers. We all spent the day at the hospital while my Dad underwent a CT scan to make sure this cancer doesn't or hasn't spread to his lungs and a MRI to make sure the surgery my Dad had had gotten all of the cancer cells from his body. We are now waiting on results which should come back by the end of the week. I pray every night that things will turn out positive and that myself and the rest of our family can "keep it together" for my Dad, he needs all the support we can give him! I LOVE YOU DAD!! And you'll pull through this, and we'll be right beside you all the way!!!
Sunday, September 9, 2012
They make Us a Family. . .Grandparents
Today is National Grandparents Day! And I have two very special people that I can honor today, my Grandpa Augustus (Gus) and my Grandma Catherine. My Grandparents have been involved in so much of my life from my birth, to my kindergarten graduation, to all of my choir concerts, to all of the sacraments, to my high school and college graduations, my own marriage, my first home and every little thing in between!
They have shared so many stories and memories, I wish I could remember them all. They have taught me what hard work is and that it does pay off, they have taught me honesty, integrity, and have shared a beautiful religion with me. My Grandpa was born August 28 and my Grandma was born October 9, they were married on May 20 and this year celebrated 62 years of marriage! They have 6 children and 13 grandchildren and to date 10 greatgrandchildren! I know they are very proud of each and everyone of us, just as we are all so very proud of them! I LOVE you Grandpa & Grandma, you are my whole world, my whole heart. I couldn't have been blessed with better Grandparents, I hope one day to be just as strong, kind, gentle natured, honorable, and knowledgeable as you both. With so my LOVE and Affection your granddaughter. . .
Brandi Michelle Nagy Thieme
Dear God, please bless my grandparents.
Thank you for the life they gave my parents
and for the life they give to me.
For the ways they helped me and made me strong, I give thanks.
For the ways they love me no matter what, I rejoice.
For the ways they have paved the road
that leads me here, I am grateful.
Let them grow in wisdom and joy in life.
Let them find peace and rest from their work.
Let them be healed of every sickness and pain.
And let them see with their own eyes
the glory of your Son, Jesus,
in the love of their children and grandchildren.
Bless them always until they come to rest in you.
We ask this through Christ our Lord. Amen.
Thank you for the life they gave my parents
and for the life they give to me.
For the ways they helped me and made me strong, I give thanks.
For the ways they love me no matter what, I rejoice.
For the ways they have paved the road
that leads me here, I am grateful.
Let them grow in wisdom and joy in life.
Let them find peace and rest from their work.
Let them be healed of every sickness and pain.
And let them see with their own eyes
the glory of your Son, Jesus,
in the love of their children and grandchildren.
Bless them always until they come to rest in you.
We ask this through Christ our Lord. Amen.
Friday, July 20, 2012
Bring on the Rain
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| july 17, first day of rain in 46 days. |
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| july 19 rainstorm coming in |
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| july 19 rainstorm p |
Monday, July 16, 2012
More Than Expected
July 6, 2000, Gio asked me if i would be his girlfriend. I didn't know then what God had planned for me and him. April 29, 2007, Gio asked me if i would be his wife. By this time i had fallen so much in love with him and couldn't wait to spend the rest of my life with him. God had tested me, him, and us, and we made it through. July 12, 2008, We said "I Do" in front of God, Family, & Friends. Both excited to begin this new chapter in our lives, and encouraged to have a long lasting relationship and marriage by my parents, my grandparents, as well as his grandparents.
July 6, 2012. We've been together for 12 years now, and the time has really just flown by, not to sure where it has went to.
July 12, 2012. We've been married for 4 years, and more in love than i thought possible.
We've grown and changed so much in the time we've spent together, but it's been for the better! We've been through some of the hardest of times, and made it through! We've been strong and successful all due to our love for each other, our strong positive marriage and relationship examples, and God! I look forward to growing old with my best friend, my love, my husband, Giovanni. I look forward to the years flying by, but revisiting the memories over and over. I look forward to falling more deeply in love with the one person i have chosen to spend the rest of my life with. Happy Anniversary Babe!!
July 6, 2012. We've been together for 12 years now, and the time has really just flown by, not to sure where it has went to.
July 12, 2012. We've been married for 4 years, and more in love than i thought possible.
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| 12 years together, 4 years happily married |
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
The Sweetest Butterflies
Finally 16, and i can start to date!! I've waited for this for what seems like FOREVER!! I have found that special someone and every minute of every day i can only think about being with him. I get butterflies in my stomach just thinking about the next time i'll hear his voice or even better see him, everything he does gives me butterflies!
Almost 12 years have went by! And so many stomach butterfly memories have passed. It sometimes saddens me to know that the littlest thing could make me so crazy, so happy, so in love. But then the sweetest thing happened and gave me the stomach butterflies that I miss. . . .Gio can remember where we had our first kiss!! I didn't even remember, and sadly I really didn't think he would care, nor did I think he even knew! But he did, and he could tell me as if it had happened yesterday. Our first kiss was at Bixler Lake in Kendallville the summer of 2000 (: <3
It melts my whole heart to know that he (a man) would remember such a thing. It brings the biggest smile to my face. It reminds me how much he really does care and love me!
I realize that Love is not measured by the amount of stomach butterflies that he can give, and I realize that I don't need stomach butterflies everyday to Love him, but after 12 years the stomach butterflies that I do get are so much more than what they used to be, and I cherish them. . . .I cherish them so so much! And you know what else?. . . .I am not sadden by the fact that stomach butterflies are so few, I actually look forward to that feeling, that feeling that I forget about, which makes those stomach butterflies the sweetest butterflies.
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